we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
3pm strippers are depressing
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I lost the right to judge tonight
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize