you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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