I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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