he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
