there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize