Since when is my name a synonym for head?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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