its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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