this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
