Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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