So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
