i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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