you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize