I must be too annoying 4 u.
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
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