I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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