the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
