I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
