He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
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