i think my tv is drunk
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize