i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
