It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
