please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You're earring is so big in my mouth
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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