i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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