i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
