Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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