That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
