Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
