I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
