Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I got inside last night via doggy door
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
