i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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