We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
