after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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