Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize