Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize