O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
