i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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