im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Come share oat with me in your robe
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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