Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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