I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Sober January is a disaster.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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