his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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