Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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