But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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