What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
