It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
