I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
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