Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
