There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
