Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
