Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize