I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
