all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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